HelmIt Follows PosterMathew

It Follows
Five Flamers5 flamers

2015 Radius TWC. Directed by David Robert Mitchell. Running time: 100 minutes. R. Starring: Maika Monroe, Keir Gilchrist, Lili Sepe, Daniel Zovatto

Helm: I can hardly believe you were brave enough to watch this movie.

Mathew: I know! Scary, right?

Helm: That was not precisely my point, but yes. I found it quite chilling.

Mathew: It was great! Smart, terrifying and thoughful without falling back on cheap shocks or excessive gore.

Helm: Yes. It actually reminded me of many encounters with the supernatural that you and I have had.

Mathew: Absolutely! It's such a simple premise, but executed so well. I was really scared in a number of places.

Helm: Some of them even in the theater. But I agree. One would think the writer/director had actually experienced a brush with some relentless evil himself.

Mathew: Dude. Why do you always have to make these reviews about insulting me?

Helm: I am sorry, but you make it so easy that it is near impossible not to take the opportunities you so generously provide.

Mathew: Whatever. Can we get back to the review?

Helm: Certainly. Of the many horror movies you have subjected me to, this was one of the more ingenious. It takes one of the very common themes of the genre--

Mathew: The idea that teens who have sex are basically begging for evil stuff to happen to them--

Helm: Yes, that--and it spins it in a very different and original way that breathes new life into the whole concept and makes it--


Helm: Well, I was going to say that it makes it a less obvious but very compelling metaphor for a concern many teens have these days in regard to engaging in sexual congress.

Mathew: Engaging in sexual congress? Sometimes I forget that you're like a thousand years old or something. But then you remind me.

Helm: I am considerably more than a thousand years old, fool.

Mathew: You're the fool.

Helm: Simply repeating my insult is not an adequate comeback.

Mathew: Is too.

Helm: No. It is not.

Mathew: Is too.

Helm: Sigh.

Mathew: Anyway, good movie. And it's not by a major studio or anything, so you should all rush out to see it in order to support indie film makers and stuff.

helmFive FlamersFive Flaming Swords!!

mathewFive FlamersFive Flaming Swords!!

Helm: So, did the evil being remind you of that thing we battled in Texas a few months back?

Mathew: Totally! Especially the way it could--

Helm: HUSH! Do not give anything away, spoiler.

Mathew: I'm not the spoiler. You're the spoiler.

Helm: YOU are the spoiler.

Mathew: I know you are, but what am I?

Helm: We are finished here.